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More About My Diabetes/Jack Bauer Man-Purse
January 11, 2007
Now, as you can tell by my photo, I am indeed a man. What kind of man you’ll never know until we meet and spend a little time together, but a man nonetheless. If we ever do meet, there is about a 99% chance that I will have a few things with me. One of these things I mentioned in last week’s blog entry, and I’d like to elaborate a little further on it. It’s my diabetes/Jack Bauer man-purse.
I typically wear it slung over my right or left shoulder, with the side I open facing out for easy access. It’s a conservative black and gray and contains pockets, zippers, clips, and hooks that allow me to strap it, hang it, or tie it to anything.
I have become associated with this bag by my friends and family. When one of my wife’s friends met me for the first time, her first question to my wife (when I was not around) was: “What does he keep in that bag?”
Well, this diabetes/Jack Bauer man-purse is full of surprises, especially when I’m headed to an airport. If you open it, you should expect to find one bottle of Lantus (insulin glargine) in the upper righthand pocket. In the outside zipper pocket there will be anywhere from 20 to 30 FlexPen needles. In the large open pocket, you will find my blood glucose monitor with extra lancets, REAL—not fake—OneTouch test strips, and my finger-pricker. Amongst all of this you should also probably see a granola bar, some glucose tabs, and a writing pad for random ideas, such as this blog topic.
In the inside zipper pocket you will find 10–12 insulin syringes, an extra NovoLog (insulin aspart) FlexPen, and sometimes an extra bottle of Lantus, depending on the status of the current bottle. There’s also an mp3 player and, if I have a show that night, a few of the CDs I’ve recorded. You will be able to tell if I have a show that night by whether I am carrying a combination of the following: a guitar, banjo, ukulele, and/or mandolin.
Now, being a man and having gone through 20-something years without carrying a purse, I never knew the attachment I would develop to such an accessory. But now I feel empty without it and will often look for it even if I know I didn’t bring it somewhere, which is very unlikely but does happen from time to time. While Jack Bauer’s man-purse has everything he needs to fight terrorism, mine has everything I need to fight diabetes. Not quite as dramatic, but certainly a 24-hour battle.
So, if you’re on the streets of NYC and see a black-and-gray man-purse accompanied by a left-handed banjo case, say hello and I’ll give you one of my CDs. And if you’re bored right now and you’ve made it this far, you may be willing to go a little further, so go check out my latest video at www.dotcomedy.com. It’s called “Peace Out.”
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